Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Exercise Envy

I took a walk in the park today.  Wait, that didn't have the dramatic effect I'd intended....

Drumroll, please....

I took a walk in the park today!!  Ta da!

Thank you, thank you all.

As you know, I've been trying to gradually increase my walking each week, a little at a time, with the help of my heart rate monitor and the beta blockers that are helping to decrease my heart rate so I won't crash so easily.  But today felt like a milestone. 

I drive by this park all the time - it's located right next to my son's school - and it has this wonderful paved walking trail all along the edge.  Every single time I drive by, I feel a surge of envy, watching all the people on the walking trail - walking, running, skating.  There are people with strollers, kids, women chatting together in small groups, even elderly people, and I want so much to be among them.  It's not the most beautiful park in our area, but I crave its normalcy, its freedom.

I wrote a couple of years ago about how much I miss exercise, and I still feel that way to some extent.  I still can't let go and experience the pure joy of unfettered movement - running, dancing, etc.  My walks are defined in part by their limits - I very carefully watch my heart rate and the time and constantly monitor my body for any signs that I need to stop.  I walked today for 36 minutes, with an average heart rate of 85 and a maximum heart rate of 98.

But I am hugely grateful that my world has expanded by this little bit. Taking that walk in the park today, alongside the other walkers - like a real person! - felt like a huge victory.  I'll take my victories where I can, since they've been few and far between these last nine years!


  1. Congratulations! Enjoy it!!!

  2. Georgina5:13 PM

    Congratulations Sue! That is a great achievement and I'm glad that it has given you such joy. I have been inspired to buy a heart rate monitor having read how useful yours has been. It isn't here yet! I'm getting impatient, although I'm also a little nervous about using it.

    I hope that you continue to expand your world, little by little.

    Best wishes to you,


  3. Fantastic!!! Good news Sue....Hope it becomes a routine for you:)

  4. That's great! I too miss exercise.

  5. Jennie Spotila8:42 PM

    36 minutes!!! Rock on! I'm still plateaued at 15, but I completely agree with what you said about a walk in the park feeling like a normal person! w00t!

  6. That is great news! Congrats! You have had a good week between the boys getting back to school and managing to go for a nice walk. Woohoo!!

  7. Anonymous9:51 PM

    I as well have EE. Exercise envy! I can walk but it is always rationed and I pretty much can't do anything else.

    I would love to just break into a jog without having to think about the 'consequences'.

    I'm glad you can at least get out and walk now. A few walks in a week does wonders for the quality of life.


  8. Oh, that's fantastic! I'm so happy for you. I miss exercise too. I have an accelerated heart rate too and heart palps that I'm on a beta blocker for. My doctor said I have POTS, at least that's what he thinks it may be. But I miss exercise so much. I can do about 10 to 15 minutes on the treadmill now every few days, but it's still sometimes a huge struggle with the CFS. I am so happy I saw your article with all the links. I'm going to check them all out and get myself a heart rate monitor and try and stay within my "envelope" of energy. Thank you so much for posting this and congratulations on your walk, Sue.

    Hugs and blessings,

  9. Oh Sue, that is such wonderful news!! I'm so happy for you. Walking is something we tend to take for granted and its amazing how much it impacts our lives when we can't do it....

    I talked to my doc about BETA blockers yesterday and he's not interested in my trying them just now.

    Again, so happy that you were able to reach such a huge milestone!!!

    Blessings to you,


  10. :) Fabulous! Good for you.

  11. Congrats!!! What a great morale booster! Celebrating our victories helps us through the rough times.

    PS- The tulips pictured on my blog were so lovely at the super market last week I couldn't resist picking up a bouquet - just because they made me smile!

  12. Anonymous1:47 PM

    Glad you enjoyed your walk and managed to do something you wanted to do - it does look nice!